Sacrifices

I am learning this week about sacrifice. I thought I knew what it was, but I really didn't. As we are going through the process of adopting, I realize that there are many sacrifices that will have to be made. Lifestyle, freedom, sleep, time, travel, extra money--these are all sacrifices I have thought about, and am willing to make. One thing I did not expect to sacrifice was my job. I once had this situation all worked out. It would go like this: when we got the call that our time had come to adopt a baby, I was going to take a month off, and then come back to work only part-time. The baby would go to Mothers Day Out 2 or 3 days a week. My manager was in agreement and seemed to be fine with this idea. Today I found out differently. While SHE was fine with this situation, our DIRECTOR was not. She told me that if I were to only come back to work part-time, then they would have to post a position for a full-time therapist to replace me, thus leaving me without a job. I felt very betrayed. I have been there 5 years and have really been loyal to them, why couldn't they be loyal to me? I could not understand why they wouldn't allow me this one thing. Now that the shock has worn off, I'm left wondering why have to look for a new (part-time) job.

I have also learned (the hard way) that no matter how hard you plan, God may see it differently. You would think I would know this by now (hello...having a baby--did I not learn anything?), but I forgot it. I should know His plan is better than mine in the end, although it won't be easy getting there.

The last time I was forced to quit a job that I loved (I got laid off), it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I'm sure this will be too, even if I can't see it right now. But it's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.

Life has been crazy!

I looked at this today and saw that I had not posted since December!

There are so many things going on in our life lately. In January, our 7-year dog Bailey started having seizures. He had one on a Saturday, then another one 12 days later, and then another one the morning after that. Our vet said we could treat it, or find out the cause. Epilepsy was not as likely because he is an older dog, so that meant it could be a tumor. I had a feeling there was something going on, so we went to the neurologist for an MRI. On Feb 2, he was diagnosed with an agressive, fast-growing brain tumor. We were devastated. Our dogs are a part of our family and mean so much to us. The neurologist told us that without treatment he only had 4-6 weeks to live. We labored over and prayed about the decision to have surgery and radiation. We did not want him to suffer, but so far he had no neurological problems, except the seizures, which were now controlled with medication. We also met with an oncologist, who was very encouraging. He said that because of the location of the tumor (in the front of his brain, close to the surface), the surgeon felt she could get most of it. Then he could have radiation and prolong his life by 2-3 years, maybe longer. And they said his quality of life would still be good, which was our main concern. As we were trying to decide, we took the dogs camping. Bailey had such a great time, you would not have known anything was wrong with him! This really helped us to decide to have the surgery. We wanted him to have more of his life to live and enjoy. So, on Feb 26, Bailey had surgery to remove the tumor. The surgeon was very pleased at how much she was able to get (all of it except the margins that were attached to brain matter), and at how well he did during and after the surgery. The day we brought him home, she said he was doing "fabulous." Here are some pics of what he looked like when we brought him home just 5 days later:

Also, they sent home with us an "art project" that he made while he was in the hospital. They said he got so hungry, that he was trying to eat anything in sight, so here is the pic:

See how evenly spaced the holes are? He is so talented! :)

He is still doing great! Since he is supposed to be on bedrest (yeah right, how do you keep a dog on bedrest?), we sent our 1 1/2 year old dog Rolo to Grandma Donna's house until Bailey gets his staples out. This weekend he seems more like his old self (even before the tumor) and feeling good. I am still making him rest, but I am allowing him more freedom in the backyard. He will start radiation 3 times a week for 7 weeks (20 sessions) after we meet with the oncologist on March 16. We really are so blessed and feel this was the right decision for him.

Most of you know of our unsuccessful journey trying to have a baby and how hard it has been. Several months ago, we made the decision to adopt a child though Child Protective Services. So as all of the medical issues with Bailey were starting, we also began our 11 weeks of parenting classes we needed to become licensed as a foster-adoptive home. We are doing what is called Legal-risk Adoption. This is mainly for infants and small toddlers. It means that they would only place a child in our home that met our criteria only if they were 99% sure they were going to terminate the parental rights. So it could be the following situations: a baby is born and the mother leaves it at the hospital, a mother drops off her baby somewhere because she does not want it, a mother has a baby in the hospital and tests positive for alcohol or drugs, and other situations similar to these. There is alot of paperwork, assessments and homework that has to be done, but we are so excited about it! After the first class, I felt sure this was what God wanted us to do.

We'll keep you updated on Bailey and the adoption process along the way.